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Saturday, January 24, 2004

Who are the adwizards who came up with that one?
I just found out this evening that Gilligan's Island had a cartoon titled Gilligan's Planet. The cast was stuck on a distant planet trying to return to Earth. I thought Turbo Teen was a bad idea, but this one takes the cake.


Suggestions, anyone?
What's the etiquette for changing hairdressers? How do I get rid of the one I've had for a year and a half? I don't want to be labeled a "hair whore."

Friday, January 23, 2004

If you see someone...
1. Alone and nervous with
2. Loose and/bulky clothing
3. Exposed wires
4. Rigid mid-section
5. Tightened hands

Also with...
1. a baby stroller or shopping cart
2. suspicious bag/backpack, golf bag
3. bulky vest or belt

He or she may be a suicide bomber.

Be sure to watch for public demonstrations and rallies, information about new groups forming, and posters, fliers, and undergroud publications.

My FBI terrorism quick reference card tells me so.

It's the weekend and I'm gonna have me some fun
I'm waiting for the Commie to call so we can pickle our livers on this fine, sunny January afternoon. I left work promptly at 3 today, drank a giant diet coke on the way home (I do, after all, like...well, you know), and plan to do whatever the hell I want this weekend. There is still a pile of linens on the guest room floor from the in-laws visit last weekend. I plan to do nothing about it. The Agent likes to come in town and leave wet towels on an unmade bed when she goes back home. You have to admire her for denying house guest protocol. But BG and the Agent's mom is house guest extraodinaire: she cleaned out our laundry room and had her husband install some sort of organizer that BG bought a year ago and we never put together, she made fabulous Brazilian rice and showed me how it's done, gave me a much needed break from her 16 year old stepson's incessant video game playing by insisting that he go to see BG's band practice. All in all a good weekend.

Now the weekend is here again. I had a fairly uneventful week despite the fact that my foot fell asleep during one class and when I went to stand I discovered that I could not support my own weight on that prickley pear. I fell down. Anyone who knows the terror of having a room full of 35 high schoolers laugh at you (not with you) knows what a trauma this was for me. I stood up and tried to right the situation with a joke (something about wanting to check the stability of the floor joists but some redneck started in about a concrete foundation...FOILED!) but there was no going back. Lucky for me, a lifetime of video games and tv has left their minds soft but not very porous. They'll forget about it in a week and be back to talking shit about Ms. L's rosacea.

Thursday, January 22, 2004

As I was exercising (i.e. walking) this evening, I witnessed a woman spin around once, throw her right arm in the air with her right foot to the side (like a disco move), and continue walking. One minute later she repeated the step. What kind of exercise tape was she listening to? Yeah, that'll burn alot of calories.

Sunday, January 18, 2004

Noxious stimuli.
Both Tallahassee malls smell like grape gum. In fact, they don't even smell that good. I think it's from those incense kiosks, and it somehow manages to permeate the building. Anyone else have this problem? My hyper-sensitive olfactory glands can't take it.

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